A Reflection from a College Senior

A Reflection from a College Senior

I’m a senior at Georgetown University, or at least, I was.  I guess, I still am for a little under a month more, but somehow, it feels like the chapter has already been closed.  It’s currently the last full week of class and I always imagined that this would one of my most bittersweet moments.  I imagined being a little scared that 18 years of education was finally ending, a little sad about leaving the place that I am so proud to call home, and really excited about everything that was to come.  As you can imagine, that’s not how things actually look.

Just over a month ago, I would have thought my current mind state unimaginable. I sobbed as my car pulled away from Georgetown’s front gates and I took one last look at the place that I love with my entire being.  I knew I’d be back, but I also knew it would never be the same again.  Never again would my entire life be contained within those gates, though it would always be home.  When I arrived home, I broke down again as I saw my graduation robe hanging on my closet door, a painful reminder of the finale I felt was snatched from me.  For days, I found myself staring at walls and breaking down into tears over the parts of my life that I would never have and never get back.  Then, I started to put myself back together– I started to do hobbies, I started to make weekly Zoom and FaceTime plans, I tried to make the best of what I had.

Then, April 4 hit.  For the last 14 months, I had been the outreach chair for a gala that was supposed to be on April 4, but had now been postponed to an unannounced date.  My work with this gala is one of my proudest achievements in college, but this pride only made its absence hurt more.  I spent the day feeling like I was drowning in my own sadness.  I was angry at myself for my own sadness– here in my home state, people are grieving daily for their lost loved ones and I was crying over not being able to put on a pretty dress and go to a fancy party.  Yet, some part of me did believe my grief was valid– I had worked hard and now, while I would be able to eventually see the event come to life, it would no longer be an event in which I had ownership over. It would not be mine.

That’s when it hit me.  The grief I had been experiencing over college ending and every missed event came down to that: it would not be mine anymore.  College wouldn’t be my life anymore.  Georgetown wouldn’t be my place anymore.  The Tombs wouldn’t be my neighborhood bar.  My campus house wouldn’t be mine anymore.  In a split second, it was all gone and in this crazy time we are living in, I felt like I never knew what the world around me would look like when I woke up. I felt like I was losing the very things I held onto for stability: the things I knew that were mine.  Without the institutions and places and physical events to grab onto, life was disorienting, especially in the midst of a pandemic where I fear even going to the grocery store.  Yet this night when I cried and the world felt like it was spinning too fast, I realized I still had so much I was holding onto as my own: I have my amazing and caring family, I have my friends from all parts of my life that lift me up, I have my years of education, I have my memories that could last me a lifetime, I have my faith, and I am blessed to say I have so many communities coming together right now.

Gratitude carried me out of the dark.  And in the light, I could finally truly see the world around me, the world that I used my own sadness to hide from.  I was afraid that if I stopped thinking about myself, I would see a world so decimated by this virus that hope was gone and light was rapidly fading. It was easy to believe this fear in this time of isolation: we cannot see anyone outside of our households, we must cover our faces now with masks when we go outside, and it feels like people have been reduced to numbers in the statistics given during daily briefings.  Fear is fair in this time, but when I looked out, I saw so much hope.  I saw so many good people doing great, extraordinary acts everywhere I looked from people organizing fundraisers to aid those in need to my neighbors coming together for a drive-by thank you salute daily at our local hospital to those using whatever talents, skills, or abilities they had to try to bring joy into people’s lives.  I even think to the small act of receiving a simple text from a friend saying hello and staying connected during this time and I see hope and grace in them.

I have found that when you allow yourself to see hope, you don’t end up brought back in by the sadness.  The sadness tricks you, it makes you think that everything is lost, but when you look up, you realize the sadness was lying to you the whole time.  Things are so so far from perfect right now, but there is still good to be found.  And while I may still wish I got to have all the milestone events that accompany the end of one’s college career, I’m just grateful that I got to be part of so much good and that I get to walk away from this university having gained so much.  I’m grateful that my family, my friends, and myself continue to be healthy and that we are blessed with wonderful people all around us.

I want to end this with some of Kate Tempest’s words, for I think she describes my feelings and this moment best:

“Even when I’m weak and I’m breaking,

I’ll stand weeping at the train station

‘Cause I can see your faces

There is so much peace to be found in people’s faces.”

 

“More Empathy

Less greed

More Respect

All I’ve got to say has already been said

I mean, you heard it from yourself

When you were lying in your bed and couldn’t sleep

Thinking couldn’t we be doing this

Differently?”

Life Update: Summer Recap

Life Update: Summer Recap

With it now officially being fall, I felt like it was the appropriate time for a summer recap (even though it still feels like summer here in D.C.).  Next up will be a list of everything I am excited for this fall and it’s near endless– fall is one of my favorite seasons!

Summer Recap:

  1. One of the things I loved most this summer was really developing what I want my blog and Instagram to be right now.  It’s gone through A LOT of changes since I’ve started, trying to find the niche that makes me happy but also serves a need for my followers.  This summer, I realized what I’m passionate about at the moment is affordable fashion. I love finding outfits that don’t break the bank but look amazing (here’s a few of my favorites that I shared on Instagram this summer).  I’ve mainly only been showing this interest and passion on Instagram, but I want to integrate it more into the blog from now on.  Don’t worry, I’ll still be doing life updates like these and lifestyle posts, but there will definitely be more affordable fashion too.

2. I got to explore California (I blogged about it here and here and here and here) and it was amazing!  I really only was in LA but I could have stayed forever with a million other things to do. I promise, I’ll be making a return to the west coast soon to explore more!

3. I worked an amazing internship!  I got to learn so much this summer while working at Amazon Web Services in digital marketing.  This internship affirmed to me that I love digital marketing and really do want to pursue a career in it.  

4. I baked…a lot.  Thanks to my roommates this summer for being my official taste-testers of everything I made!  My favorite recipe by far was the recipe for Banana Bread from Flour Bakery in Boston.

5. I went to Her Conference and left feeling empowered and inspired!  It was such an amazing opportunity to hear so many amazing women speak about their lives and journeys.  Also, here is where I discovered journalist Mandy Velez, whose story of paying off her student loans is SO inspiring.

6. Visited some museums!  When I was in Orlando, one of the things I missed most about DC was all of the amazing and accessible museums.  This summer, it was nice to have some time to explore the museums (thanks to all the friends who joined me for these adventures!)

7. Turned 21!  I, of course, had myself a week of festivities and I am so grateful for my friends who celebrated with me, including those who came from out of town to join the fun!

8. Had a mini DCP roommate reunion!  If you’ve been following for a while, you know how meaningful the DCP was to me and my roommates played a HUGE role in this!  I was so excited that two of them were able to come to DC for a weekend and celebrate my birthday and our friendship together!

9. Made it to two boy band concerts: Backstreet Boys and the Jonas Brothers.  I’m not a huge Backstreet Boys fan, but their concert was so much fun and I danced the night away!  The Jonas Brothers is the concert I’ve been wanting since I was 10, and it truly made all my childhood dreams come true.

10. I am impressed with the amount of tv I managed to watch.  I was an avid follower of both the Bachelorette and Bachelor in Paradise, along with binging Riverdale, Jane the Virgin, and Veronica Mars on streaming platforms.

 

That’s all that I was up to this summer!  I’d love to hear what you were all up to and I can’t wait for next week’s blog post of the 10 things I’m most excited for this fall!

Disneyland v. Disneyworld

Disneyland v. Disneyworld

At the end of May, I visited Disneyland for the first time in almost ten years.  As someone who proudly calls Magic Kingdom her home park, I knew that I would spend much of my time in Disneyland comparing it to WDW.  I’ve spent a lot of time since coming home trying to give the most objective comparison possible between Disneyland and WDW and my determination of which is the better resort/park. I’ve decided to break this comparison down to a few categories: rides, shows/parades, food, hotels, fastpass experience, and aesthetic/appearance.  Let’s dive right in!

 

Rides: To do this category justice, I have to break it down into two categories: rides that the two parks share and original rides.

 

Shared Rides: Disneyland and Disneyworld basically share most of their e-tickets including the three mountains (Space, Big Thunder, and Splash), Pirates of the Carribbean, Haunted Mansion, and Jungle Cruise, along with some smaller rides, such as the Adventures of Winnie the Pooh.  Some of these experiences are significantly different– Pirates of the Carribbean is significantly longer in Disneyland and much, much creepier. Other rides, like the mountains, are slightly different experiences but if you’ve ridden them a few times, you’ll be sure to notice.  Space Mountain, for example, uses different rider cars on the two coastlines and while many enjoy the more traditional car used in Disneyland, I think the experience is far more intense on the bobsled style car at Disneyworld. Other rides, like Jungle Cruise and Haunted Mansion, definitely show which one is the original, with Disneyworld’s versions having the little improvements to make a big splash.  There were a few similar rides I didn’t try out, knowing the Disneyland version would make me miss my version at Disneyworld, such as the DL version of astro-orbiter (after riding these with a view of Happily Ever After, I don’t think a smaller and shorter version could ever compare) and Dumbo the Flying Elephant, which lacks the theming of Storybook Circus I love so dearly.

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Disneyland’s Small World

Winner: On the shared rides, I have to give it to Walt Disney World.  As they say, second is the best, and Disneyworld definitely benefits from being second to receive most of these rides.  

 

Original Rides: While two parks have so much in common, they also have a lot of original rides.  I fell in love with California Adventure and the many original rides the park has to offer, including Mission Breakout and Radiator Springs Racers.  Disneyworld also has a plethora of original rides, such as all of its Animal Kingdom offerings and many of its Epcot rides. I have to say I have never been a big Animal Kingdom fan and could easily skip this park when visiting Disneyworld and while I love Epcot, it is not for its ride offerings but rather its ambience in World Showcase.  And while I will always say that Magic Kingdom is definitively the world’s best theme park, the many dark rides that Disneyland’s Fantasyland have to offer, such as Alice in Wonderland, do make this land stand out and pop much more than some of Disneyworld’s rides like Seven Dwarves Mine Train. 

 

Winner: In this subcategory, I have to give it to Disneyland.  Their exclusive rides are e-ticket attractions that are immersive, creative, and original. 

 

Winner for rides: The two resorts end up in a tie in this category, each winning one subcategory so I will give them each .5

 

Score: Disneyland .5, Disneyworld .5

 

Shows/Parades: Both Disneyworld and Disneyland offer many parades and shows throughout the day and night.  It is important to note here: Disneyworld has a HUGE advantage. There are four parks– WDW can have one meh parade/show (example: the First Order in Hollywood Studios) and make up for it with another amazing one in another park (like Festival of Fantasy).  When I visited Disneyland, the Red Car Trolleys were under renovation so I didn’t get to see them perform (and apparently, the show is permanently closing now) and I missed having a light-hearted show like on Main Street in Magic Kingdom or Hollywood Studios.  I loved Disneyland’s parade, but I am a bit partial because I LOVE Mary Poppins and loved seeing her featured. I also want to give Disneyland some points in advance, because the Main Street Electrical Parade (aka my favorite parade of ALL time) is running for a limited time there this summer and I am VERY jealous that the west coast gets this beautiful   parade again. Disneyland also wow’ed me with their performance of Frozen, which was truly Broadway levels of good. Frozen was definitely the best show I have ever seen in a Disney park, but Disneyworld offers some great options, with Festival of the Lion King and Finding Nemo the Musical. What loses Disneyland major points was is its nighttime shows in comparison to Disneyworld.  World of Color is a beautiful and moving show and I can see how it greatly inspired Happily Ever After, but it didn’t have the full effect that Happily Ever After gives. Also, I found myself wishing they had set the show up in a space more similar to Rivers of Light– if you weren’t in the front for World of Color, you weren’t seeing much. Further, Disneyland’s nighttime offerings had me wanting to fly to Florida immediately.  Mickey’s Mix Magic was playing while I was at Disneyland and this firework show did not hold at all when compared to ANY of Disneyworld’s offerings. The show felt like it was pandering to a youthful audience and it lacked true heart to it.

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I would go back to Disney California Adventure just for Frozen

Winner: Disneyworld.  While Disneyland shone with its theatrical show of Frozen and its parade offerings, its nighttime offerings really did not their own.

 

Score: Disneyworld 1.5, Disneyland 0.5

 

Food: To judge this category fairly, I also will be breaking it up into three subcategories: table service, quick service, and snacks.  Table service is worth 0.4 points, quick service is worth 0.3 points, and snacks are worth 0.3 points.

 

Table Service: Growing up with trips to Disneyworld, there is nothing I love more than a good character meal.  With diverse offerings in Florida from 1900 Park Fare to Bon Voyage to Tusker House, there is no shortage of character offerings with great food and a great interactive experience.  Unfortunately, the same can’t be said across the country. While at Disneyland, we went to Plaza Inn at Disneyland for breakfast and Goofy’s Kitchen at the Disneyland Hotel for dinner.  Plaza Inn was a complete flop– the characters ignored us for the first thirty minutes we were there, the food was bland (the french toast tasted like someone threw a bottle of cinnamon on it and called it a day), and the service was WAY below Disney standards, with it taking thirty minutes before we could get any information about gluten free options for the allergy in our party.  Goofy’s Kitchen had much better character interaction but the food was not great. The best things there were the mac and cheese and the chicken fingers. For non-character table service meals, we ate at Carnation Cafe and Lamplight Lounge. While both of these restaurants were good, they lacked a spark that makes restaurants such as Coral Reef, Hacienda San Angel, and Skipper Canteen so special.  

 

Winner: Without a doubt, Disneyworld.

 

Quick Service: While Disneyland flopped with its sit-down offerings, it shone with its quick service.  My first quick service experience here was Tangaroa Terrace, where I got nachos and dumplings.  They both were amazing and I returned here for breakfast, where the french toast blew me away. I also stopped at Flo’s in DCA and had their french toast (I REALLY like French Toast, I’m not even sorry for how much french toast I eat) and loved it.  I also loved the complete theming at Flo’s. I also had to get Mickey Beignets for an early breakfast and while these tasted more like regular donuts mixed with funnel cake than traditional Beignets, I still thoroughly enjoyed them and very much would get again.  My one quick service let-down happened in DCA at the Pacific Wharf, where I ordered potstickers and an orange chicken rice bowl. While the potstickers were delicious (though a small order of only three), the orange chicken rice bowl was far too spicy for my liking and did not have enough orange taste to it.  While Disneyworld does have some stand out quick service locations like Satuli in Animal Kingdom and its offerings throughout World Showcase, it typically does not shine in its quick service. If is festival season in Epcot, I may take back that statement but generally, I would stand by it. And though I may have a soft spot for Peco’s, I’m not sure the average tourist would fully agree.

 

Winner: Disneyland.  While Disneyworld has seasonally good quick service offerings, it falls to offer consistently good quick service options throughout all of its parks like Disneyland does.

 

Snacks: This is by far the hardest category of all to rank.  Disney snacks around the world are the absolute best, with the classics like Mickey pretzels and churros and seasonal specials.  I loved all the snacks I tried in Disneyland, from the nom nom cookies to the ice cream treats to the Mickey rice krispie treats.  I also though love Disneyworld’s snacks, such as the soft serve at Storybook Treats, the changing milkshake at Auntie Galaxy’s, and the numerous treats found around world showcase.  

 

Winner: Truthfully, the two resorts are almost even in my mind in their snack offerings, but having world showcase pulls Disneyworld right over the edge, as it offers such a huge range of snacks to try.

 

Winner: Overall, Disneyworld wins in food, with better table service and more snack offerings.  Disneyland though shines with its quick service.

 

Score: Disneyworld 2.3, Disneyland 0.8

 

Hotels: Disneyland offers a very different hotel experience from Disneyworld, with only three Disney-owned-and-operated hotels, compared to the numerous offerings at Disneyworld.  For this trip, we chose to stay at the Disneyland Hotel, which is equivalent to a Disneyworld deluxe hotel. The first reaction to the hotel was a bit of surprise– this hotel does not throw Disney magic at you in the same way as Disneyworld deluxe hotels or even the Grand Califorian do.  However, little bits of magic are found around the hotel with notes of history. The rooms were beautifully sized and the castle headboard is definitely the star of the hotel. I can say I truly LOVED staying here, but still, the theming definitely fell behind the theming I love at Disneyworld.  It didn’t transport me anywhere and seemed confused, with a monorail pool slide but Trader Sam’s tiki bar next to it. The Grand Californian seemed to have a much more cohesive theme, but because I did not stay there and only walked around it, my experience has to be based solely off the Disneyland Hotel. 

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We stayed in the Fantasy Tower at Disneyland Hotel

Winner: The winner is Disneyworld, but I want to give some points to Disneyland because staying at the original Disney hotel truly was a bucket list experience for a big Disney fan like myself, so I’m giving 0.3 points to Disneyland for that nostalgia factor.

 

Score: Disneyworld 3, Disneyland 1.1

 

Fastpass Experience: The fastpass experiences are completely different at Disneyland and Disneyworld.  Disneyworld uses the Fastpass+ system, where you make three reservations a day in advance.  Disneyland uses the original fastpass system, with the option to buy Maxpass so you can make fastpasses on your phone.  While Disneyworld lends itself to the ultra-planner, I found Maxpass a much more effective and efficient system. I was consistently able to get fastpasses for everything I wanted to ride, without being stuck to a stringent schedule.  I also was not tied into one park, being able to move from fastpass to fastpass in different parks, compared to having to have three in one park at Disneyworld.

 

Winner: Disneyland, while Maxpass costs extra, it proved worth it.

 

Score: Disneyworld 3, Disneyland 2.1

 

Aesthetic/Appearance: This category is probably the most controversial I will rank, as everyone holds their favorite quite close to heart.  I think California Adventure is a completely underrated park. I thought this park was truly gorgeous, with Pixar Pier, Cars Land, and Wine Country standing out to me.  The park did an amazing job of grasping different areas and truly transporting guests to them. I can’t say I feel the same about Disneyland. Disneyland felt crowded. Tomorrowland felt cramped and closed, Fantasyland felt overrun with small walkways, and the castle, while in beautiful pink, lacked the grandeur I expected.  I will say both New Orleans Square and Toontown shone in my eyes as unique and beautiful areas, and I have not visited Galaxy’s Edge so I can’t say how I would feel about that. I felt the parks lacked the beautiful spots like Cinderella’s wishing well or the Italy pavilion in world showcase or Pandora in Animal Kingdom.  

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Pixar Pier

Winner: Disneyworld.  While Disneyland had its beautiful spots, it lacked the smaller spots of beauty that make Disneyworld such a special space.

 

Final Score: Disneyworld 4, Disneyland 2.1

 

If you’re thinking about a Disney trip, you’ll never go wrong but in my opinion, if you’re focused on Disney, book a flight to Orlando.  There is so much to do in Disneyworld, you could stay forever and never get a month (I stayed for four months and wish I could go back daily).  The resort truly transports you to a magical place. The memories and happiness the place brings are definitely worth the splurge.

 

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Exploring Southern California: Part One

Exploring Southern California: Part One

With the school year finished and my internship not starting until the beginning of June, I had some rare free time.  This summer, I am filling this otherwise dead time with a trip to Los Angeles. I am so excited about this trip and to share little snippets of my day both here and on Instagram.  I love to travel and I have always wanted to get to know the West Coast better, so I am loving the opportunity to travel and see all that this area has to offer.

Day One: Travel Day!

Call me weird, but I always get SO excited for long flights because I love getting to disconnect and catch up on movies.  I am a total movie junkie, so six hours on a plane just watching movies is the best to me. This time, I watched Mary, Queen of Scots, I Feel Pretty, and Smallfoot.  Mary, Queen of Scots is one of my favorite historical figures and Saorise Ronan is one of my favorite actresses so I was thrilled to finally get to watch this movie! If you’re a European history lover, I would recommend it, but if not, it might not be your type of movie.

After getting into LAX, we picked up our luggage and rental car and drove a little over an hour to our hotel, Marriott’s Newport Coast Villas.  We checked in, dropped off our luggage, and went out for dinner at Sol Mexican Cocina.  I cannot say enough good things about this restaurant!  We had shrimp taquitos for our appetizer and I got the chicken street tacos as my entree and they were AMAZING.  Our waitress was so kind and even gave us a dessert, which was so tasty I never even had time for a photo. We are making plans to get back to this restaurant asap.  After dinner, we returned to the hotel to get some much needed sleep.

Day Two: The Richard Nixon Library & Museum and Exploring the Resort

I am a total history nerd and that is about to show through SO much.  One of my biggest bucket list items is I want to visit every Presidential Library in my lifetime.  Before this trip, I had visited the libraries of Ronald Reagan, George W. Bush, and Franklin Roosevelt.  When my dad pointed out that we would be near Richard Nixon’s Presidential Library this trip, I jumped at the chance to go and mark another Presidential Library off my list.

The library was truly fascinating.  I’ve studied Richard Nixon numerous times in classes, but I had never taken such an intensive look at him.  The library also really dives into Watergate, which I appreciated and found so interesting. My favorite part though was exploring the outdoor grounds.  Pat Nixon’s rose gardens are so beautiful, I kept stopping to look at every flower we passed. We also got to tour the house outside that Richard Nixon was born in and spent his early childhood in, which was a really cool and unique experience.  While this library was not my favorite of the libraries I’ve toured so far, I truly did enjoy it and loved the opportunity to learn about Richard Nixon from a perspective I haven’t had before.

After we finished the library, we stopped at Blaze Pizza for a quick lunch and then went back to our hotel.  It was too beautiful a day to stay inside, so we went out to explore the resort grounds a bit more. This place is so gorgeous, with views of the Pacific everywhere (including our room balcony!).  Everywhere on these grounds is stunning and I am truly in love with the resort and with the beauty of California.

Afterwards, we went for a late dinner at Reunion Kitchen + Drink in Laguna Beach.  I’ll be honest– I was mostly excited about this spot because I watched every episode of Laguna Beach and the Hills when I was in high school as a guilty pleasure.  Getting to go to the town where it all started, even if just for a restaurant, was super exciting. The food also was amazing at this restaurant, which was a wonderful end to a great first full day here in California.

Day 3: The San Diego Zoo

It has been about fifteen years since I last went to San Diego, so you could say my memories of the zoo and the city were pretty murky.  I did remember seeing pandas here, so you could say I was slightly disappointed today when I found out that the San Diego Zoo no longer has any giant pandas.  Despite this set back, we had a lovely day at the zoo!

Fun Fact: The San Diego Zoo has the largest colony of koalas outside of Australia.  I was SO excited to get to see the koalas and they were so adorable. They don’t do much, as they sleep approximately 22 hours a day, but they look like teddy bears when they sleep.  I could have spent hours just watching them.


After the zoo, we drove back to Newport Coast and grabbed dinner and called it an earlier night than we have been having.  Tomorrow, we are continuing our adventures and heading to Beverly Hills and yes… I will be singing this song the entire day.

My Spring Style Essentials: the perfect sweater

My Spring Style Essentials: the perfect sweater

Spring is my favorite season. The temperature is just perfect for a light jacket or sweater, the sky is blue, and the flowers are blooming.  I find it so hard to be unhappy during spring time, because everything around you practically screams, ‘be happy!’

I also love how much longer the days stay bright.  My days involve being inside from about 10 AM- 6 PM and during winter, I am always so sad to leave work or class to find the sun has gone down and it is pitch black outside.  Seeing the sun at the end of the day gives me so much more energy.

My favorite part of spring though is the style.  People always talk about fall fashion, but I think they are missing out on spring fashion.  I love wearing bright colors, specifically pink and yellow, and love being able to do this during the spring.  I also love wearing navy and that usually doesn’t fall into the autumn color scheme, but is an essential for spring/summer style.

So, today, I am starting off my spring style essentials list with my absolute favorite sweater, the Tippi sweater from J Crew.  The sweater sells for $79.50 and is currently 30% off.

I love this sweater because it is so versatile.  It’s a really light cotton and it works beautifully paired over dresses or collared shirts, but also looks great on its own. I also love how bright and fun it is.  Here is how I am styling it right now for spring:

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I’ve paired it over a sleeveless summer dress I got from Gap two seasons ago and I love how it makes this dress functional in the cooler spring temperatures.

If you are looking for this style of sweater but don’t want to splurge on it, J Crew factory offers a version of this sweater called the Teddie sweater for significantly less money. Currently, a bunch of colors in the Teddie sweater are on sale for between $24.50-$34.99.  I own the Teddie in Navy and I love it, it’s slightly thicker than the Tippi sweater, but otherwise looks the exact same. Here’s how I styled my Teddie sweater this fall:

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To make this look work for spring, I would just get rid of the tights and change the shoes to a cute pair of flats or sandals.  I would also add a bright statement necklace to this look for spring to brighten it up a bit more.

Sharing My Playlist for Life’s Most Overwhelming Lyrics

Sharing My Playlist for Life’s Most Overwhelming Lyrics

Yesterday was a hard day.  I felt overwhelmed in every aspect of my life– professionally, I have a big decision coming up and many interviews; academically, I had a paper due that I struggled A LOT with for my hardest class; socially, I get down on myself that I’m not a good enough friend because there are weeks where I feel like I don’t make enough time for my friends.  On days like that, self-doubt creeps in and tells me that I’m only overwhelmed because I’m not good enough, not smart enough, not strong enough. I know I’m far from being alone in feeling like I’m constantly fighting a little monster in my head– if you’re feeling this way, I want to remind you: we are stronger than that monster.

I turn to music when I’m overwhelmed to help me fight the monster. I feel like music can help me feel seen and understood so I’m sharing below five of my favorite songs that help me calm down and also, a link to my spotify playlist.

 

  1. Hold On by Shawn Mendes.  

 

Favorite Lyric: And it won’t slow down, no matter what you do, so you just gotta hold on.

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  1. Girl in the Movies by Dolly Parton.

Favorite Lyric: I want to be happy, I want to be free, just like that girl in the movies.

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  1. Flicker by Niall Horan.

Favorite Lyric: Then I look in my heart, there’s a light in the dark.

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  1. Inside Your Heaven by Carrie Underwood.

Favorite Lyric: When minutes turn to days and years, if mountains fall, I’ll still be here.

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  1. 1973 by James Blunt.

Favorite Lyric: I will always be in a club with you in nineteen seventy three, singing here we go again.

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Here’s my entire Spotify playlist, which I do periodically update and add new music to:

February Goal Check-In

February Goal Check-In

Can you believe it?  We are two months into the year already and it just feels like 2019 is flying by.  With the year rolling and the semester halfway done already, I feel this is a good time to do a goals check-in and set some goals for the rest of the semester.

Goal Check-In:

Goal #1: Plan Less: This was my biggest goal for the year and the goal I’ve seen the most progress on.  I’ve said goodbye to my Google Calendar, where I would plan out every single minute of my day.  I mean it– I would create time periods for sleep. Productivity was the name of my game, but I just ended out burnt out and unhappy.  With a less structured schedule, I’ve made time in my life for the moments you don’t always predict– the meetings that run over, the random run-ins and catch-ups with friends, and time to relax and breathe.  I’ve still got a LOOOONG way to go on this goal, as I usually can still be found making plans weeks in advance and still have a pretty stuffed calendar, but I’m getting there.

Goal #2: Spend More Time with Friends: Whenever I get busy, I tend to isolate myself and only spend time with the people who directly relate to whatever I’m busy with, whether that’s work, extracurriculars, or class.  Whenever I do that, I create a stress bubble for myself, as I’m only around people who share my stresses and struggles. I’ve been trying to make time for all my friends this semester and I’ve been doing pretty well on this.  I’ve been getting coffees and dinners with friends I wouldn’t otherwise see and Facetiming my long distance friends.

Goal #3: Get to the Gym: This is the goal I have been so sporadic about.  There are some weeks where I get myself to the gym daily with excitement about the next episode of my podcast.  And then, there are weeks when I can’t even fathom where I’d get the forty-five minutes a day to spend at the gym.  I’d day I’d score like a 4/10 on this goal so far.

Where do I go from here?  Well, I consider the progress I’ve made so far and use that to help me form new goals for the rest of the semester.  Here’s what I have so far:

  1. Continue to try to plan less and be more spontaneous.  Try to go into a weekend with nothing on the calendar and just make it up as I go.
  2. Make time for myself.  I often feel like on the weekends, I’m exhausted from everything and just need some time to decompress with myself.  I want to start making time a few times a week for me to do this so it doesn’t pile up.
  3. Actually get to the gym consistently.  I really want to get into the habit of going daily or every other day and so, this is a goal I want to continue working on.